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Long time no blog as have been in land of superior cricketers since Boxing Day, and I was in no mood to spend more money on internet access to update our activities and impressions on life.
Things did not go as per plan for the England cricket team nor us, or for that matter the other stupid ever hopeful English cricket followers.

We turned up in Melbourne with the series over, but hopeful of entertainment and something to be proud of. We were met with the most abject performance and shortest game time of the tour. (Was Sydney any better? (answers on a postcard to Freddie and the crew, c/o Humbleland, Southern Hemisphere) Joe and I went to day 2. The MCG is still an impressive place, I am comparing to my last visit in 1994, when England were again a markedly inferior team, though not whitewashed. That was when the “Barmy Army”, was new and drove me to distraction as they had only one song, which the sang all day long; “Barmy Army,Barmy Army,Barmy Army,Barmy Army,Barmy Army,Barmy Army,…….get the picture?Am I going on? Have you heard this before? Where was I? Any way, the MCG is impressive, but different, I assume following upgrade for Commonwealth Games 2006. I seems to lack something. Maybe it just seems a little bland now.
Early on things looked hopeful, England bowling after ridiculously low first innings score, but Australia struggling and wickets falling, despite Hayden being given the “no getting out with LBW card” for this innings by he South African fellah, and then going on to score 150+. Symmonds came in and struggled, and pressure was maintained…..but…….second session was plethora of runs and I sat quietly for next 3hours. Nil to cheer about as ball made regular journeys to boundary. The most annoying thing being the fact I do not like Symmonds, and he became an overnight superstar.
Anyway the third day was so terrible that the 4th day was not needed. I was pleased that it did end on evening of third day as I had no desire to watch the last painful moments on the morning of day 4. We had tickets, but not needed. To add insult to injury, I now have to apply for refund within 30 days, I will be charged an admin fee for the pleasure to boot! I have yet to find the secret address to ask.
Melbourne had some delights to offer. Some sunshine, a beautiful botanical garden and a nice little cruise along the Yarra. The trams were good.
We then headed to Sydney. It was meant to be by train but because of engineering works….it ws coach and train.Hmmm.
More later

This is the view Santa will have in a few hours time. Can you spot our house?
Christmas Eve has finally coincided with some sunshine, so family trip to Khandallah pool, remember that place? E, J and I all jumped in and made lots of noise, even Sara had a swim. MG laid at the pool side and fell asleep.
Entertainment on the deck this afternoon, and I expect early to bed to be fresh for the mad paper unwrapping. I have been a good boy all year, so have eight presents under the tree for me.

Last night picked up EQ from end of year, end of school disco. I stood there with the other parents waiting for the music to finish and the lights to come up. I was nosing to see who big daughter was with This is the beginning on a new phase, the picking up after the disco time, but when not really wanted around to see what is going on. I think there will be more of this, and as time goes on, the parental presence will be less well tolerated.
Daughter looked attractive. I think some boys have noticed,as phone calls to house have started.
I will have to wheel out the grumpy Victorian father persona to keep them on their toes!

You now that you are getting old when your children start changing schools. Eleanor is coming to the end of her time at St. Benedict’s and will soon be going to college as it is called here;onto year 9. So as school finishes this week then there are lots of final events going on.
Last week there was the formal dinner for the class with parents. “Formal” might be over doing it but it was on a small scale.
Then tonight there was the school carol service at the local church followed by by the prize giving for the year. Eleanor was a worthy winner of the the cup for special character; the all round valuable person prize.
Parents are proud as punch.

This is posting 100, so how appropriate that I had a cricket theme in mind.
Joe had saturday morning game, the last in the usual tide of events until after the school holidays in February. Summer weather it was not. I sat scoring while being frozen by the unelenting wind. The boys in the game strugled to bowl into the wind and looked like Brett Lee with it.
Joe’s figures 4 overs, 1 for 12. He was player of the day for his bowling and a fine catch behind the stumps with the gloves on.
In the afternoon we went off to the Basin Reserve to watch NZ play Sri Lanka, who it appears are always over here! A small crowd watched in the chill wind. Not pleasant, and certainly not Perth.
NZ are set to lose the game after a low 1st innings score, and Sri Lanka looked comfortable without having the need to push on. Probably too cold for them as well. We only arrived for the last session, but even Joe wanted out before the end of play.
And then home to watch the Ashes live……shite. A painful experience watching the bowling being hit all over the ground, and what opportunities came England’s way not being snaffled.
All not helped by fact that here we receive the Australian Channel 9 coverage, so I had to listen the endless gloating and laughing. Much rather get English commentary with misery and saying how shite they are.
Trip to Melbourne looking to be more of a punishment now. Though Big Al sitting through 4 days(5 looks improbable) of Perth in company of Aussie mates must be an effort.

How many times have I told myself that sport is not worth getting worked up about?

A trip to the Khandallah Fair, and a special request to have a couple of dudes dance for the locals. Three performances in total, with a larger audience than the old fuddy duddies playing country music.

My new mode of transport, which is purely functional and nothing to do with trying to regain my youth or a way of dealing with my middle life crisis. Some wife’s however, do not believe such comments, and are convinced of early death, nasty accident and disablement.
It is 15 years since I last had a mean machine, and that was a 400cc beast. Given that this is nearly new, more modern, though 250cc, it is as powerful and the old number, though possibly not so heavy.
This is a South Korean make. I think they plan to have the same impact in the bike world as they have in the car world.
Anyway, happy motoring with the wind in my flowing locks.

Back on the Saturday morning sport routine now that the sun has finally come out. Joe and the lads were able to get out and get some willow on leather-some better than others.

Good conditions and a tidy spell of bowling from Joe, 0-3 off 3 overs. As I was looking side on from the scorers chair , and soI did not get an impression of accuracy, but flight looks better and batsmen certainly not hitting him all over. Time still to work on bowling, and more so batting. Joe will be in the cauldron of cricket camp in January. We go away to Hawkes Bay, with the better and more reliable weather where he plays for his club against other teams. Upto 6 games in 4 days, dependant on form of course. Could be interesting, and I expect there will be more scoring or such like for me. I am no longer coach, due to leave to north, and so all other tasks within my remit.

This blog is a hot news item. The Ashes contest has just started, and given our global poition it is alot more convenient to watch it this time around. However, the opening day is just about to finish with a bad day at he office for England. It reminds me of the day 1 of the series in 1994, when I sat through a long day at the GABBA, surrounded by increasingly pissed and happy Aussies. The first day dominance is reminiscent.
As the is lots of tv watching to go, and I am due to attend the 4th Test , lets hope things move on up from here.

So back here in the NZ groove. Family life continues, and even work has restarted!

So what was good about the UK?

• The weather, much to many Kiwis ignorance. It was unseaonally mild in the autumn, but made it delightful. Beautiful trees and skies.
• Museums. Having not been inside them for while of ever, the likes of the V&A and Tate are great.
• London sights. Being effeectively a tourist was a great experience, especially the evening I walked along the Thames on the south bank past Lambeth Palace, St Ts, and the Palace of Westminister. On other days walking past the Houses of P, and watching the tv broadcasters do ther thing on the green. Cool.
• Friends. Seeing people and being treated so well.
• Quiz nights done the pub and occasionally being allowed “off the bench”. (You are only as good as your last answer). Training to get the gut off.
• Driving on a motorway
• Being the the sun and not being burnt instantly
• Sadly, for such a style guru-M&S.
• Ireland
• Being able to drink bitter( but not in combination with curry on a Friday night)

So what was not so good?

• Congestion, London in a car on the wrong day, or on a motorway when everyone else is.
• NHS bureacracy. The paper pushing obsessives whio think a collection of paper, and being asked for the same thing more than once helps. This is all linked in with the obsession with avoiding risk, but by using procedures that do not, but give the veneeer of “doing something”.
• Fear of Johnny Foreigner. Or is it simply fear of “Janek”. Everyone seems to have a “problem with the Poles” story, even those who in other circumstances would present themselves as liberal minded and protector of the weak. Polish appears to mean Eastern European. Everyone moans, though forgets it is those same people serving them in all the pubs they go into. This whole thing is not helped by the tone and marketing of gutter middle class newspapers.

Not much else. Great place even though everyone will tel you the place is going to the dogs. Though admittedly, Brentford are.